المساعد الشخصي الرقمي

مشاهدة النسخة كاملة : HR



monashazly
08/12/2008, 02:54 PM
After 2 years of selfless service, a man realized that he has not been promoted, no transfer, no salary increase and that the Company is not doing any thing about it.

So he decided to walk up to his HR Manager one morning

and after exchanging greetings, he told his HR Manager his problem. The boss looked at him, laughed and asked him to sit down saying;



My friend, you have not worked here for even one day.

The man was surprised to hear this, but the manager went on to explain.



Manager:- How many days are there in a year?

Man:- 365 days and some times 366



Manager:- how many hours make up a day?

Man:- 24 hours



Manager:- How long do you work in a day?

Man:-

8 am to 4 pm i.e. 8 hours a day.



Manager:- So, what fraction of the day do you work in hours ?

Man:- (He did some arithmetic and said 8/24 hours i.e. 1/3(one

third)



Manager:- That is nice of you! What is one-third of 366 days?

Man:- 122 (1/3x366 = 122 days)



Manager:- Do you come to work on weekends?

Man:- No sir



Manager:- How many days are there in a year that

are weekends?

Man:- 52 Saturdays and 52 Sundays equals to 104 days



Manager:- Thanks for that. If you remove 104 days from 122 days, how many days do you now have?

Man:- 18 days.



Manager:- OK! I do give you 2 weeks sick leave every year. Now remove that 14 days from the 18 days left. How many days do you have remaining?

Man:- 4 days



Manager:- Do you work on New Year day?

Man:- No sir!



Manager:- Do you come to work on workers

day?

Man:- No sir!



Manager:- So how many days are left?

Man:- 2 days sir!



Manager:- Do you come to work on the (National holiday )?

Man:- No sir!



Manager:- So how many days are left?

Man:- 1 day sir!



Manager:- Do you work on Christmas day?

Man:- No

sir!



Manager:- So how many days are left?

Man:-

None sir!



Manager:- So, what are you claiming?

Man:- I have understood, Sir. I did not realise that I was stealing Company money all these days.



Moral : NEVER GO TO HR FOR HELP!!!



HR = HIGH RISK



And in the employee's opinion.....

H = 7ASBY ALLAH WA NE3MA EL WAKEEL

R = RABENA YA7'ODOKO

باسين بلعباس
08/12/2008, 03:56 PM
حتى هذهno sirكان يقولها بحرارة..
وكأنها جريمة ترتكب في حقه..لو اشتغل في يوم العيد الوطني أو نهاية الأسبوع..أو ..
ولكنه يريد وظيفة بدون عمل..
كل أيام السنة لا نعمل فيها حسابيا طلعت العملية..
عامل لا يعمل..
قاعد طوال العام..
الحساب المنطقي لا يختلف فيه اثنان..
1+1=2 وليس 3 أو 7..مثلا..
لأن الرجل يعمل ثلث اليوم(هذا أنموذج)يعني24:3=8
وثلث أيام السنة366:3=122
وإذا أخذ يومي العطلة الأسبوعية..في السنة52×2=104
فكم يوما يعمل هذا الانموذج..؟
122-104=18 يوما..
يحتاج الى اسبوعين في السنة
7×2=14
ويبقى للعمل
18-14=04أيام..!!
لا يعمل ..في الأعياد المختلفة..الوطنية والدينية والخاصة..
ماذا بقي من يوم للعمل..؟؟
لا حول ولا قوة إلا بالله..
........................................
حساب لا يخلو من المنطق والعقل..
لكن نحسب أنفسنا نعمل..
هل هذا صحيح.....؟؟
عدد الأسابيع 52 لماذا ضربت في2؟
مادام أنها fin de Semaineيعني بيومين وليس بيوم واحد..
آسف على الكتابة بلغتي لأنني لا أجيد استعمال لوحة المفاتيح باللاتينية..
وربما بقيت حتى نهاية أعياد الميلاد وأنا أبحث عن الحروف والترتيب..
تحيتي وتقديري...